Why you should never work with amateurs

So this might make me sound all selfish and full of myself but somebody needs to speak up about this nightmare of working with those who are just not qualified to do the job and haven't got a clue about being professional.

See this dog that the model is holding? Well, that was meant to be me in that place but the photographer kept insisting that the dog should be the center of attention, not me. I later heard that the dog has some useful contacts (I think his second cousin Cecil was a stunt dog on one of the Hollywood movies or something, can't remember which one now) so he got him this gig as a favor.

As you can see from this photo he was getting all big headed and kept calling me a loser.

Well that was a big mistake. The dog could not wait until the photo shoot was over and before you know it he was doing something unmentionable next to this lamp post.

After the incident the model refused to hold the dog again or stand next to the puddle that the dog had made, and who can blame her?

Once the dog realized that none of his photos would end up in the magazine he kept barking questions about who turn the water tap on and kept the water running during this photo shoot. But I had no idea what that's got to do with any of this so I refused to answer any questions. What a loser.